I wonder what you’re like …

I think of you, I dread the moment to have you here. I wonder what your tone is like or even your complexion. Have I ran across you? Have you passed me by and I’ve not noticed? Or have we been in contact but maybe bad timing?

I wonder do you pray for me? Do you talk to God daily about me? I can’t wait to wake up next to you and smile. Those will certainly be the joyous of moments I’ve waited patiently for.

Some people may not understand but I’ve saved the best parts of me for you. My mind for you to explore, my body for you to keep, and my soul for you to cherish. Those are things I’d rather keep reserved for you.

Each night I lay alone I don’t mind at all because I know that one day laying alone will turn into laying with you. I want to admire you, protect you, pray over you, just be your peace of mind. I want to support you, uplift you, speak words of life over you. All around I want to make you feel amazing, I have faith I’ll receive all those in return.

I ask myself sometimes what’s taking so long? But then I realize good things take time. I can truly see God is taking his time with you.

Whoever you are I pray you read this and smile. One day we’ll run into one another and our hearts will connect. Our hearts will find favor in one another, maybe even race. This will be a feeling we both feel and a moment that’ll last a lifetime.

– A woman patiently waiting on love ❤️

Seeking season …

With so much going on in today’s world, we are triggered with what would happen next. There’s so much violence, kidnapping, robberies, you name it the list goes on.

Today I want you to take control over your thoughts replace it with the goodness of his word. Of course things happen around us that we don’t seem to quite understand however in a season of seeking God I found that if I spend more time in search of him I wouldn’t be so accustomed to the world.

Just want to encourage you that no matter what may take place around us, we are already safe in his arms. In the Bible it states clear as day “You will seek Me and find Me when you search for Me with all your heart.” Jeremiah 29:13

Seeking God will ignite the eternity He placed in every heart and sets our mind on eternal things. While the world says, seek fulfillment to find life, God’s word says in seeking Him, you will fulfill your life. His strength is limitless. When our knees become weak from pressure and our hands tremble with fear, He strengthens our way.

  • Let the heart of those who seek the Lord be glad. 1 Chronicles 16:10
  • Let all who seek You rejoice and be glad in You; Let those who love Your salvation say continually, “The LORD be magnified!” Psalm 40:16
  • But may all who seek you rejoice and be glad in you may those who long for your saving help always say, “The Lord is great!” Psalm 70:4

Below is a list of affirmations to decree over your life to anchor your faith unto the Lord. These truths will give you confidence into your identity:

  1. God will never fail me or abandon me.

2. God provides the refuge and shelter my soul seeks. 

3. God is my strength and my shield. 

4. God has not given me a spirit of fear, but of power, love, and a sound mind. 

5. God has fully and completely redeemed me. 

6. God has chosen me. 

7. God is with me always, even when it doesn’t feel like it. 

8. With God, all things are possible. 

9. The steadfast love of the Lord never ends.

Have a great week as we celebrate a day of love tomorrow ❤️. I’m praying on this journey God will give you revelation to all that’s in store.

Clearing up space …

This year I wanted change, this is by far the first year I’ve ever saw consistency with my decision making. I’m going to the gym literally everyday, I’m eating healthier, no fast food I mean I’m finally on this path I always aimed for.

Well that’s the health part, then you have life in general I’m regaining my faith, I’m better aligned, I’m smiling more, I’m getting back to me. Then there’s the love life still at a stand still. By this being the most focused year for me I decided to get even more focused and just delete every man’s number I’ve ever came in contact with.

I know Wow right? But listen this year I want to date, I want someone to actually treat me and we have fun and leave our worries behind. I want to laugh, I want to smile, I just want it to be us! Seems as I always come across the ones who rather lay up and that’s no fun besides I’m not the type of woman to stoop so low.

I want a fresh start and not one guy has taken the initiative to actually take me out and we enjoy each other’s presence. It’s always “can I come over?” or “you want to come and chill?” It’s never get dressed I’ve made plans for us, do you see what I’m saying?

Now if I seem picky to you, No! I’m not. What I do know is there’s more to life than sex or me being someone’s downtime. I actually want to date and enjoy life. Just quality time with someone! My purpose of erasing those contacts was to ultimately make room for the permanent. I call it clearing up space.

Lately I’ve came across temporary and what I desire is something that will be long-lasting. So if I’m being too extra, that’s just my desire! I’m not interested in short term, I deserve solid and secure.

So now it’s goodbye to the ones who made me feel unworthy, I apologize for setting my standards with a level of respect and integrity. This year I’m preparing myself for long-term opportunities those brief moments I held with certain individuals will no longer serve me any justice.

Defeating depression..

Firstly if you’re facing depression know that you are not alone. In fact 1 in 10 adults deal with depression. We are told medication is one of the treatments. Instead, I believe identifying what caused you to have a sudden turn in life would definitely help you to cope. Why do you feel isolated, maybe alone, or what about unworthy. Do you feel hopelessness? Are you having a loss of interest or pleasure in activities? You could possibly be facing depression and not even know it but I’m here to tell you, you can & will overcome this battle.

The beginning of the year I faced depression silently. This was a stage I’d never encountered. All of a sudden I felt unpretty, unworthy, unorganized, I mean you name every negative feeling that was me. I didn’t want to do anything but stay in and hide me. It was this one day I sat and was fed up. I opened my Bible and what I saw could possibly change my life. Here was a verse of many meanings that read:

“Then if my people who are called by my name will humble themselves and pray and seek my face and turn from their wicked ways, I will hear from heaven and will forgive their sins and restore their land.”
‭‭2 Chronicles‬ ‭7:14‬ ‭NLT‬‬

Do you see how powerful this verse reads? Humble yourself, pray, seek God & turn from evilness, he will restore you! Wow! All along I thought I was living right until I encountered a bumpy road. It had been months since I’ve went to church, I was coping with the lost of my Aunt, life was passing me by and I was ignoring the one I once relied on (the word).

It was in that moment I realized I was off track and my first step was to identify what was the cause. You see I never took time to grieve, I also dealt with rejection, plus losing my job, & now my faith. I began to be so sad in life, I hid my feelings from my family I didn’t want them to be concerned. My bills were behind, life surely just knocked the wind out of me but guess what? Even though life was beginning to defeat me I got up and defeated it.

The first step was for me to get back involved in church so I reached out for one on one ministry to better align myself. Since I’ve been getting help I’ve now identified certain barriers in life I had no idea I was facing like abandonment & breaking generational curses. I have such a heart of relief now. I thought years ago I was healing instead my healing is now in progress.

“Healing to heal others”

I’m beyond proud of myself for taking these steps in life but most importantly knowing I had others who genuinely love me as I am (Family) made things much easier. Just to think of who I was in the past has now paved the way for who I’m now becoming.

Listen it’s okay to not be okay & it’s also okay if you don’t have it all put just as of yet. I thank God for another opportunity at life to walk in the path he’s set specifically for me. I’m smiling more, I’m praying more, I’m studying more, I’m living more for me. Now that I’ve tuned the world out I figure this time is for me. I hope & pray if you’re facing anything that life is throwing you too will overcome.

Remember your season is not their season and their season will surely not be yours. Remain humble in all things. Good things take time and good people remain patient.

It’s time to flourish and be free! I sense Freedom for you, I sense Restoration for you, I see Peace stored upon you, you will Win in the end!

This next season I owe God everything!”

New Year, New Blessings!

🎆

Wow here we have it 2022! What’s to come 2022? let’s say bigger faith, stability, love, & success. If I’ve never had more faith in my desires I feel this year would bring me all that I’ve been patient for.

I take this as a fresh start at life to mend things to take certain adjustments and one way I started off was minimizing my social media. Some things hold a big impact over your life and for me the message I receive from social media was all a comparison game. I do not aim to be like anyone but myself so I wanted to start fresh and make things simply on the focus of me.

🚩

I want to live the life God wants for me, I want to dive in the word more, I want to study God and spread the joys of life to others. I want happiness for me and my family. I aim for success over my business and yours. I want good things to happen overall I want us all to WIN!

•What are some goals you have set?

•How do you plan to achieve them?

•How’s your spiritual life?

•How’s your faith in yourself?

•What are your ultimate goals?

My advice to you is to Write!Manifest!Believe! This year will bring greatness I can almost sense the approvals, new opportunities, marriages, and goals being accomplished.

If no one is ROOTING for you, I am! Here’s to the success this year will bring. May all work in your favor as we take on new beginnings and fresh starts. Remember the only thing stopping you from achieving is the voice of the enemy. In all things have faith and tune out the negative. This is your year of comeback and breakthroughs.

To the good life ….

When things get tough . . .

What do we do when we face challenges? We lose hope, we lose faith, we see no way out, we begin to worry and we panic. Let’s evaluate the situation. You say you believe in God right?

“Don’t be afraid. Just stand still and watch the Lord rescue you today. The Egyptians you see today will never be seen again. The Lord himself will fight for you. Just stay calm.”
‭‭Exodus‬ ‭14:13-14‬

“So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.”
‭‭Isaiah‬ ‭41:10‬

Think of all the times in the Bible God made a way where it seemed to be impossible.

•He moved mountains

•He walked on water

•He tore the veil

•He healed sickness

•He opened prison doors

•He calmed raging seas

We tend to focus more on our problems instead of finding time to be thankful in the mist. Surely someone is going through a tougher situation than you are. Truth is things may not get easier for us we just learn to become stronger.

READ!

Sometimes, life can be a bit of a fight, especially within yourself. Therefore, having your reasons for continuing will always help pull you out when times are tough. Tough times bring out the best in every individual. When life gets tough, one should not lose hope as the best view comes after the hardest climb.

“Challenges are what make life interesting, and overcoming them is what makes life meaningful.”

—Joshua J. Marine.

“If you are feeling low or trampled, unappreciated or forgotten, and you are reading this, realize it is an illusion. The hope is real, you are valued, and what lies ahead is brilliance.”

-Tom Althouse.

“Life isn’t about waiting for the storm to pass; it’s about learning how to dance in the rain.”

– Vivian Greene.

Listen!

Hope you find this message helpful, take good care of yourself & never stop counting your blessings!

If he wanted to, he would..

One of the hardest things with dating is finding someone who’s consistent. I often run across the saying “If he wanted to, he would” and now it all makes sense.

A man will only put in time with a woman he interested in, if the consistency stops with you… it’s with someone else. In no form of way I’m trying to bash men, but this is to help women be aware when it comes to situations like this.

What’s for you will flow naturally, if you have to beg or question it….it’s not for you! A real man will never put you in a position to where you have to wonder.

I ran across someone I found great interest in however once things begin to fade I began to question myself. Sometimes we as women tend to believe it’s us when in reality it’s not. Just understand that maybe you’re not for them & they’re not for you.

We must learn to let things go instead of furthering things that eventually will drain us of our peace. No person is ever too busy to make time for someone they’re pursuing. When the excuses get to flowing in, the time starts to fade, your mind gets to wondering it’s time to break lose.

A quick tip for singles while dating:

Don’t settle for being an option! You are worth more than being someone’s down time. Have respect for yourself and your body, don’t allow everyone to have access. Be picky with you. Have faith that one day the right person will come along. Never lose hope, anything you desire will be granted when the time is RIGHT!

Coping with the lost of a love one during the holidays..

Although things seem fine for everyone else you’re the one hurting, crying, missing a piece that was valuable to you. I know the feeling I myself lost my Father on November 24, 2011 which fell on Thanksgiving day. Just to arrive to the hospital room and head straight to the consultation room and doctors say “we’ve done all we can.”

Can you imagine how I felt? 8 months pregnant! My heart raced, for a min I thought God let me down I even questioned him and asked God why?

Truth is we do not quite understand why we face trial and error however a mistake we make is trying to figure out why instead of realizing that’s an area that’s already planned out it’s all in the works.

I may have a solution for you. Do you know why we go through pain? I can explain it. I have came to realization that we need pain in order to grow. Pain pushes you to your fullest potential. Here’s an example think of a breakup, everything you do after that is what we call a glow up! Like you’re working so hard to perfect yourself so the one who mistreated you witness your success.

Well death of a love one is quite the same, think of it when your love one pass away, we dedicate everything to them. The strive I had came from the pain I faced over the years. Yes I’ve been broken, yes I’ve been mistreated, yes I’ve been lied on, yes! Yes! Yes!

Moral of the story: If it wasn’t for pain, we wouldn’t push ourselves. I think of it as no struggle, no push. So while you’re coping and not quite understanding know that every tear has a reward. Every ounce of pain you’re facing will be replaced with the joys of life. One day you’ll see you needed to go through the pain to reach the new level in your life.

I pray you take this moment and be thankful for what’s to come! “The pain you’ve faced won’t compare to the joy you’ll feel soon.” Praying for strength over you today & every other day that’s ahead. Take time & enjoy family & great food.

Happy Thanksgiving family & friends 🦃

-C.Dillard

Pick Me ..

Here in this single season I’ve sat alone and seems as if every man that comes across me I’m just another option standing in line yelling “Pick Me!” You know the feeling of knowing the answer with your hand held high wanting the teacher to call on you? That’s me!

Why is it that men aren’t consistent? Why is it that men don’t communicate or show their emotions? Why is it that men lie? I desire to learn from a man, someone who’s willing to guide me and teach me new things however the men I attract are husbands, boyfriends, and prisoners. I leave them right in my inbox (laughing).

✌🏽

I’m so tough when it comes to dating there’s this guard up I place as soon as I feel a connection so usually I step aside “fall back” to protect me. Truth is men will say any and everything to keep me but when it come to their actions *thumbs down* they’re horrible. So I try to play my part by not getting high hopes, I usually feed off the energy given.

I’m a woman that’s selfish I’m not to fond of sharing I want my own person, my own Man! The good thing about me throughout my singleness I’ve had time to observe me & learn me, let’s just say I’m far from perfect. I’m aware of things I need to change within myself but it’s been kind of cool identifying flaws and working towards a better lifestyle.

Although it sucks I embrace every single woman to not fall for a number in line. The right man will lead you out and focus solely on you. I’m talking time, love, affection, and attention. (Notice I said nothing about money) Here’s my thought as a woman when you work hard what a man brings is a plus but his money is not for us to rely on. If you have a hustle within yourself anything he brings is a bonus.

You get it?

I will not spend my years just being “The Go To” or “The Spare Time.” In this stage I’m saying my goodbye to the times I jumped up wanting to be called and hello to the now. Somewhere there’s a man who’s going to acknowledge me, lead me, and make me his top priority.

It’s possible, LOVE is out there, remember you’ll never have to force or beg anything that’s for you!

Idea behind the business ..

Deciding to start a new business can be hectic or better yet the feeling of who would support you can be heavy on the mind as well.

I decided to start a new cosmetic business with nothing to my name but faith. I know it sound crazy but FAITH lead me to get up and get at it.

I was laying in my bed and I received a vision and instantly I thought “who would support me?” God instilled into me if I go for it the rest would align itself so here I am today owner of “Beaudee’ by Courtney.”

Life would try to paralyze you if you do not get up and go after what you want. I’m just starting off and I don’t quite have everything I need but Philippians 4:19 assures me of my supplier. I see several women with their business running smooth and successful, I smile knowing that one day I will be there.

When you’re running a business be patient, take your time, don’t look at others and lose hope into what you’ve put in. Hard work pays off eventually, you have to go for what you want. You can be anybody and do anything you want if YOU believe you can achieve and accomplish.

I’ve realized running a business you are your worst critic, speak life and affirm greatest over your business. You will prosper throughout it all.

I tell myself all the time just imagine years from now and where I’d be, not only myself but your business. I’m speaking sale increases, more customers, more products, more visions, new outlooks into the business world.

2 Chronicles 15:7

“But as for you, be strong and do not give up, for your work will be rewarded.”

Just as well as I’m aiming to make it you can too! Be patient, keep positive outlook, be prepared at all the enemy will attempt to throw. You got this we got this. Keep going! Don’t lose hope in yourself!

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